Cryptogram of Wayfarer Evangelion version
by GrowPulter
Summary: the love story between Kaworu and Rei had begun. But, you know someday Kaworu will be killed by Shinji, and Rei will lose her mind. they will try to continue the beautiful story, through the death, and adam& eva
1. Kanpeki na ko

Disclaimer:

This story is based on Neon Genesis Evangelion.

Dedicated to my friend, DemonicBlackCat (yoi ao….review ya say), who loves the pairing of Rei and Kaworu, and to all of the Evangelion lovers…

Have a nice reading….

That girl is cool enough….Wuehehehe… as a wayfarer or maybe….spacefarer, I always likes that girl….forever…..

Still don't get it? The girl…..with aquatic blue hair…..What a matching color with my sea-grey hair…. Okay, maybe you think that I'm a loopy boy….In our first meeting, straightaway I tell you about a girl.

Wuehehehe…without ignoring a matter of fact that I like beautiful girl, I dared to say that the girl…with flaming but cute red eyes has made me influenced.

And we are similar right, what I mean is we are 'the winged creatures from heaven'….you know….angel (pretty call)…… But, sure…my blood of the heaven is thicker then hers….

Okay….I think it's quiet good enough for the first meet and greet. See our romantic story in this full-of-love story… Wuehehehe…..

Kaworu…-sexy angel-

Cryptogram of Wayfarer

Series

Evangelion version

Chapter one: kanpeki na ko

"Hullo Rei….." I greeted that icy girl.

Rei turned her hear and took a freezing glance at me.

"Good morning, Nagisa," she said calmly.

Hehehe….she was pretty cold at the first time…But, surely you would see how Kaworu, the sexy angel would turned her 180 degrees into a girl with my approach.

Oh…forgot…the setting of this meeting was in the classroom, it was still in the morning….the classroom was still not too full. Just us and some other kids.

"Last night I had a creepy nightmare," I started to begin the conversation.

"Really?" she muttered without paying any attention.

Well, maybe at the beginning, she didn't like my attitude too much…You know…sometimes I looked like a playboy…..

But no…it's not true…Kaworu the sexy angel is pretty kind-hearted! Remember that!

"I was caught by a monster," I told her a fake story.

"Well, it's just a nightmare right….I mean…it didn't really happen right? Nothing to be worried," she mused monotonously.

"Rei, are you a girlfriend of Ikari?" I asked her.

Just for unimportant chat.

However, I felt that there's something between them that more than an ordinary friendship.

Not jealous, just wanted to know more.

She glimpsed at me with that cold-cute-burning-red eyes.

"I mean…Shinji….It's impossible to be Gendou, right?" I said again.

Then, she stopped glimpsing at me with the cold eyes. She shook her head.

"No," she answered.

"What are you thinking about? It's ridiculous," she continued.

Hohoho….Have you realized it? Have you? I would tell you….at least….she increased her statement….so, she thought our conversation important enough to be cleared.

I wanted to ask her more flirting questions….but that fucking shit teacher came and broke all my genius plans….Damn it…..

Then, I sat next to her.

Sometimes gazed at her, it's a fan service to see her beauty. Then, I took my books from my briefcase….Put them on the table….Ready to cover my nap as long as the study time at school.

Then, when I gazed at her again, of course a professional like me just used a little wrinkle at my eyes corner…it's better to take a look at the real beauty than listening to the boring explanation from that old fellow.

Then….it happened. She looked at me once, with a little bit blushing face….

At that time, hundred songs of "Hip hip Horray!" filled my brain well. It's a jolly time…..

This sexy angel made a little move successfully. At that time, I had a thought that looking at her back with a warm eyes that may be could neutralize her icy eyes was a good idea.

Then, I realized that, by the time goes on, we will be together. I knew surely about that.

Location: NERV base

"Kaworu….what are you thinking about?" a boy's voice murmured.

Then I was woken from a dream. I glanced at the voice's source….Shinji….

"Yo, Shinji," I replied his sentence.

"You seem like thinking something, what is it?" he asked me.

That time, we were going to the staffs' canteen, not a real canteen….Just a bunch of automatic machine that sold food.

"Something good," I responded.

"Good…." Shinji muttered.

"What about you…You like tired, pal," I asked him back while he was pressing some switches on the machine.

"You know…it's tiring to be with Asuka, there's always that she wants, there's something that she would tell us to do, there's something important for her that needs our help…no…takes our help by us….That commanding girl….tiring…" Shinji mumbled to me.

I just smiled….

'Ha…it's your own fault to work with that girl mostly, and I get the rest….not the rest….the better one….that cherubim…..Rei, that amazing angel…just a little bit frozen by some incidents, but Kaworu will warm her again,' I commented in my heart.

I saw Shinji was pressing some buttons too.

"Kaworu, do you want me to buy it for you too?" he snapped.

"Ah…..yes, sure," I replied him.

"Which one do you want?" he snapped.

I smiled again, and took a glance to the food dummy at the display. Well, as a wayfarer (or spacefarer) I hadn't known earth fast food too much.

"Umm…..this one," I chose a kind of food.

"That one?" Shinji asked me, didn't believe. I nodded.

"Yes…that one…What's the matter?" I asked him innocently. Shinji thought for few seconds and said 'um……'

"Actually, it's okay. But, only if you can handle…it's very hot…full of chili….Even Misato could hardly handle that," Shinji explained to me.

"Then….choose me the safe one," I told him.

"Instant curry will be a safe choice, even it's a little bit boring," he recommended that food.

"It's fine," I murmured. Then, he pressed some switches. And suddenly he handed over me. I looked at him confusedly.

"What?" I asked him.

"The coin, for buying the food," he explained me confusedly too. We both were confused.

"Oh….right," I groped around my pocket, tried to find some silly yen coins. Then, I found one. I put it out, and gave it to Shinji.

"Here….is this enough?"I asked. Shinji took the coin from my hand, and glimpsed at it.

"Yes, it's enough," then he put it into that machine. That luncheon was just an ordinary lunch, there were only some unimportant chats, some glances, some laughs, some grins. But the wayfarer liked to know more about the earth.

This afternoon wasn't sunny, it's quiet cool and windy. After school, I went to the river bank, the ruins of something that I didn't know; maybe from a building that had been attacked by the angels before me….

I climbed the rocks there, and sat on one of them. Looked to the sparkling river water, let the breeze played my hair, snuffed the cool-fresh air, and hummed some songs that I liked. The pretty river-spray was just like singing a poem for me.

Wahhh…..after looking at this beautiful and peaceful view, sometimes I thought that it's very unfortunate to destroy this place…

Suddenly, footsteps fell on my ear. From the place that river runs somewhere close by. I turned on my face, looked around. My eyes captured a beautiful girl's shadow.

It's Rei, stood about seven meters from me.

"Ahh….Rei," I muttered, and stood.

Then, she climbed the rocks too, and came over me. She stopped in front of me.

"What is it?" I mumbled. She breathed short, maybe because she just climbed the rocks.

"Just wanna tell you…that today there will be a test in NERV," she told me.

"Ah..fine," I spluttered.

And for a while, silence was the king there. And for a moment, we had looked at each other. I saw at her icy ruby-red eyes. And I was sure enough that she saw the flaming fire on my eyes too.

"So…." She made the silence evaporated.

"The test will be begun at 3 o'clock. You still have two hours to finish your business first. Katsuragi-san wanted all of the eva pilots to be there at the time, "she clarified again strictly.

"Yes, I'll be there early," I mused.

Silence again….o…silence really had its victory there.

Her head bent down.

"Is there….anything else?" I asked her carefully.

She shook her head after thinking for few seconds. I nodded, and curved my lips.

"Well, because there's nothing else, then I think I have no business again here," she uttered.

"Has Ikari known about this?" I inquired.

"Yes, of course," she retorted. I thought she was a little bit nervous.

I smiled honestly.

"So, you want to go now?" I snapped.

She looked up, into my eyes. "Yes, I think so," she answered.

Ha! Of course I wouldn't let this archangel went.

"To where?"

"My apartment, or to NERV base,"

"What will you do in the NERV base this early? Reading some boring science book?"

"I don't know,"

_Silence……………._

"Don't go, stay here with me….."

"What?"

"I mean nothing you can do there besides being a bored girl. You better stay here with me, refresh yourself. You know, it's beautiful here, right?"

"Yes, it's beautiful here,"

"Then stay here for a while, it's better that waiting for the train in the station, or just sitting without pal in NERV base and eating automatic machine food"

"You're not wrong,"

"Ha ! Sit here, Rei. Besides me, let's have something to talk and enjoy this peaceful place,"

"Okay…"

Then, she sat beside me….For a while, we were silent, and just looked at the river.

The wild-pink flowers petals flew as the wind blew.

The breeze was so nice there.

Then, I saw something from the ground.

Something tried to go up. And after few seconds, I saw a small head with brown eyes and whiskers came out from the ground.

"Look at this Rei, how cute," I pealed and pointed at the little creature.

Rei turned her face, and looked at what I pointed. Then, a little smile rose on her lips.

"It's a mole," she uttered. I gazed upward, at her pretty face after paying attention long enough at the cute animal.

"What?" I asked her again, didn't get it well.

This was the moment that I never predicted. She smirked and suppressed.

"It's a mole, Nagisa. Don't you ever see it before?" she snapped.

It was nice to see her smiling at me.

I shook my head happily.

"No, I have never seen it before…What a cute one," I responded.

Rei smiled again.

"It lives underground, digging to make its home," she explained. Then, I felt so excited to talk with her.

I mean….what happened? Did this sexy angel have successfully change that icy (but beautiful and great) girl into a cheerful girl with shining days?

For the first time….she explained something to me….

Talked much enough……more than I thought

Silence….

Then, for the first time, we enjoyed the silence between us.

Sometimes silence made it good…

Sometimes silence grew up the seeds of love…

Between Kaworu and the graceful cherubim, Rei…..

The perfect cherubim…………………

The perfect kid………..

Kanpeki na ko…..

Chapter one ended


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter two

NERV base always looked same, every day. Still needed more laughs I thought. It's normal to see the sorrow situation. How can't it be? This building was filled by worried people.

Worried about the next coming up angels, about the pilot synchronization test, and about the love…Humans were so strange …

Nowadays, I didn't care about those things in NERV base. Well, if you paid attention enough, you could see so many love struggles here. Then, by the time went on, I realized something's wrong for me.

I saw Rei and Ikari were walking and talking together. First, I didn't care about that. But, since I had been watching them, I saw that Rei had an expression too while being with Ikari.

I thought that kind of expression was just for me, and may be for Gendou. But, she looked alive with that boy, with Shinji.

I could feel my self was burned by the jealousy fire. I tried to make the fire out, but it had no use. My face turned to be firm. No smile was left on it. And my heart wondered very well to see her with Shinji.

I thought I cold save her, I could make her back to my side, to the angels side. She was made from Adam, right? I thought the blood inside her was thick enough that couldn't be defeated by her urge to be a human.

But I was wrong. I could see that she was happier being a human than as an angel. She fought the angels. She fell in love with the bastard human, Gendou, even that I knew well that Gendou could hardly respond that feeling.

I wanted Rei, but she seemed belongs to the Ikaris. I didn't know who would she choose, the father or the son. I wanted Rei. I wanted her to be with me.

Until the day I couldn't hold my burning emotion anymore. The day that I saw her with Shinji again, talking after visited Asuka in the NERV hospital. You know…..Asuka got an accident from one of the angels. So, it's my turn to replace her place. After her talk with Shinji, and they weren't together anymore, I came over that boy.

"Yo, Shinji,"

"Oh, hi Kaworu,"

"You visited Asuka?"

"Yes, I did,"

"How was she?"

"Still same. I think she will never get her life back. She is deader than Eva,"

"I see,"

"And how about you, Kaworu, don't you visit her?"

"I prefer not to visit her. Meanwhile, I got some annoying work recently,"

"You will replace her place, right? As the pilot of unit 2,"

"Yes, I think so,"

"So, that's your goal to be here,"

"No….the Seele chose me as the 5th children. I don't know why. So, as the 5th children, I think it will be my job to beat the angels too,"

"Who are you exactly, Kaworu?"

"Still don't know who I am? I'm Nagisa Kaworu, ask your father, he will tell you the details. Wanna see my identity card too?"

"No, it's fine,"

"Good,"

_Silence……_

"Shinji…." I called him.

"What?"

"Can I ask you something?"

"Sure,"

"What kind of relationship that…..that….um…that you have….with…with Rei?"

"Friends, I think,"

"Friends? Well, during the facts, it's doubtful,"

"Kaworu, what's wrong with you?"

"I just…wanna know. For some important reasons,"

"You liked her, right?"

I was silent…My heart was speared by his words, by the facts he had known.

"Nope,"

"Really? Kaworu, Rei is untouchable. I hardly talk to her,"

"Shinji, there's something about her that may be you haven't discovered,"

"What's that?"

"She is different with you. I'm also different with you,"

Silence….I thought Shinji had already knew about that

"It seems so,"

"But, about the untouchable Rei, I think she is very kind,"

"Yes, she is,"

"By the way, Shinji, I have another business. Sorry for disturbing you. Good bye, see you in the next synchronization test," I waved at him.

"Yeah, good luck," he waved at me too, and we took separate ways.

I have something important to do.

I was standing in front of the door signed "Commander Ikari Gendou". So, this was his office. Grand enough, for the Seele betrayer. I pressed the switches on the interphone there.

"Who's that?" a woman voice

"Yo, it's me, Nagisa,"

"Tell us your complete name,"

Oh my God, how **talkative** are you….

"Nagisa Kaworu, 5th children, the one who will pilot unit 2 soon enough," I spoke mockingly at her.

Silence……

"What kind of important business you have here?"

"A kind of he wants to know,"

"What's that?"

"It's personal,"

"Tell us or you won't come in,"

FUCK YOU, bitch!

"Okay, okay, granny. It's about 1st children, it's about Adam, it's about the next angels attack, it's about Dead Sea Scrolls!"

Silence…….HA! You were surprised right! HA!

"Okay, come in,"

The sound of cracked lock was heard.

Then, I opened the door, and saw another door again. Ah…what an annoying doors. I opened the second one, and I saw a huge and dark room. I saw the desk, about 10 meters in front of me.

Gendou was sitting there, and Ritsuko, was standing over him. They both looked at me coldly. I walked over them, and stopped in front of the desk.

"So, you could tell me what you wanna talk about with us now," Ritsuko muttered. I still didn't say anything. They waited for a while. "Okay, tell us Nagisa," Gendou started to talk. It revived my courage

"I want the 1st children," I said with trembling voice.

They looked at me strangely, like I was a weird person.

"What do you mean with that sentence?" Gendou asked me.

"Before continuing the statement, I would like to ask some privacy,"

"Which means?"

"Get this woman out of here,"

"What?" this time Ritsuko yelled.

"I feel annoyed with her appearance, and I think I can't continue this important chat if she's still here,"

Silence…..

"So….what do you think, Ritsuko?" Gendou spluttered at her.

I think she understood.

She nodded and snapped, "I'll be in my lab". Then, she walked through the door, left us. When she had vanished, I came back to Gendou.

"I want Rei,"

"You're kidding,"

"Listen to me, Gendou. Don't sacrifice her to complete the fucking destiny that Dead Sea Scrolls talked about,"

"She is a part of the destiny. And so are you, so am I,"

"Let me save her,"

"We have to complete the destiny. Don't fight the destiny, Kaworu. You'll be lost,"

"No, if you let me change a little point of the fate, just one little point, and you even don't have the next plan to beat the angels,"

"I won't give her to you, Kaworu,"

"I'll place her in the right place,"

"Her place is here, on the earth,"

"Don't sacrifice her just to follow your bible's instruction,"

"I won't, you know it well Kaworu,"

"You don't believe me now, but you'll be sorry in the future,"

"She won't be sacrificed. She is the Eva pilot, she is too important to be killed,"

"You don't know what you're talking about now. Let me save her,"

"Kaworu, she is safe here. You just do your job,"

"Many people will be killed by your plans, Gendou,"

"May be,"

"Don't place her as the substitution of Yui"

"They are different,"

"Yes, they are. But you make them similar. You destroyed her slowly by doing that,"

"I cannot say anything about that,"

"She loves you Gendou, but I wonder, do you love her too?"

Silence…..

"There are so many things you haven't understood, Kaworu,"

"I know…Me and Rei are Adam's children. You know that, right?"

"Yes, I know it,"

"Can you just let me save her…I..I love her so much…I don't wanna her die,"

"There are 'many' Reis…you know...Since we have developed Adam's cell. Which one you want to save?"

I could feel the pain in my heart. He developed Adam's cell into many Reis…with same body…he made her just like unworthy, that her life could be replaced by the others if she died.

"This one. This one who lived in this time. Rei II,"

"I don't think you can do that?"

"But if I can?"

"No Kaworu. I won't let you. I can't take that risk. She is still NERV's,"

I was pretty angry.

"Whatever you say,"

Silence….

"Then, if you don't have any important business any longer here, you may get off from this room,"

Then, I walked, left him beside, through the door, and after I got out from his room, I got an idea.

Maybe I couldn't make Gendou do that.

But may be I could make Rei unable to be sacrificed.

Then, after those ideas, I came to her apartment as fast as possible.

I knocked her door hard. Then, may be because she was disturbed by that voice, she came out.

"Yo, Rei,"

"Kaworu? What are you doing here?"

I smiled at her, felt happy seeing her beauty

"I wanna talk to you,"

"Wanna come in?" she said slowly and opened the door huger.

"Yes," I responded her with my warm smile.

She let me in, and we sat in the living room.

"I'll make you some tea,"

Then she walked to the kitchen, cooked some water and took a bottle from the desk. I saw she added the tea from the bottle to the hot water, and prepared two cups. I saw, her pretty hands reached the tea filter.

I came over here, and helped her to pour the tea to the cups through the filter. Then, she smiled a little and gave me one of the cups.

"What is it?"

I drank the tea a little, and looked at her eyes deeply.

She came over me with her monotonous way.

"Let me save you," I whispered at her ear.

"What?" she murmured.

Sarcastically, I reached her body, and hold her tightly

She was surprised and shocked. Her eyes went bigger.

"What are you doing, Kaworu?"

"Let me save you. You won't be happy in NERV. Don't give shit of that guy,"

"What?"

"You have to know that Gendou just places you as the substitution of Yui,"

She trembled.

"I already knew about that,"

"I love you Rei, let me save your life,"

"You won't be able, Kaworu,"

"You'll die if you are still in NERV,"

"That's the way I want,"

Silence……

"We just have to do our role in this world. Besides that, we don't have to know more. We don't have to discover more, we don't have to do more," she mused.

"I hope we can do that,"

Then I burst my lips on hers.

For a while, I thought she wouldn't return it

But she returned it, responded well.

Her lips were so warm, so soft, so perfect.

I thought I wouldn't let her go forever.

Finally, after we broke, I smirked at her.

"Am I the first one who stole your first kiss?"

She smiled

"No…that guy is Gendou,"

I smirked again.

"I exceedingly felt jealous of him," I suppressed.

This time, I wasn't angry.

Gendou stole her first kiss, so what?

I still smiled at her, and she smiled at me too.

I wished this happiness could be forever

I wished….But I wondered…


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer:

If you haven't watched the anime until the end, reading the comic number nine could help you to understand this story. But actually, if you haven't done those things, it's still okay. Just if you want to know the details, those things will help you a little bit. And, this chapter is a little bit related to The Heart of Ayanami chapter four, if you're interested to read this story from another version and POV. But, I must warn you that this story isn't same with The Heart of Ayanami chapter four. Just related…

Chapter three:

This is what I was afraid for long long time ago. But no one listened to me, they didn't believe what I've said. And Rei, the girl that I wish she could spend the rest of her life with me, had to be sacrificed, for the Human Instrumentally Project, and to complete what Dead Sea Scrolls had said.

It's started from my inability to prevent her sacrifice to NERV. It was still early in the morning, when I saw Rei was sitting on the pool side of NERV's park. Thinking something that it seemed not easy. I walked steadily to her, and sat next to her. I saw she turned her face and stared at me, then, she kept looking at the pool…thinking something.

"Good morning," I greeted her with a smile. "Good morning," she replied softly. "It's still early. What are you doing here?" I asked her. She glanced at me. "Nothing important," she muttered. I smiled again. She sighed. "You still can be happy, it seems there's no worried expression on your face. I envy you for that," she murmured. "Why do you think we have to worry?" I asked her gently.

"Because…can't you feel it? The time is coming. The end is getting closer. I can feel that since the longinus spear was used to attack the angel," she talked slowly. I smiled again. "Whatever will be, let it be…We won't be stressed if we think that way," I spoke confidently. She smiled too. "I think…I must have your thinking way…Henceforth, there are so many Reis in this world, if you know…so I mustn't be afraid of anything…There are still many successors of me," she mumbled with a unnatural smile.

"Even that…there are so many successors behind us, it doesn't mean that we may not have feelings and emotions," I mused. "So, you have seen the aquarium, full of my selves there…Of course you know how I'm not worth in front of NERV and Seele. They still have stocks…" she snapped. Silence…"It has been a long long time ago since we didn't chat like this," I gazed at her calmly. She just nodded and a little bit smiled.

And it began…the alarm rang everywhere, made ugly noises. "It's an alert. We have to go," she was back in her monotonous speaking way. She stood up and turned her head to me. "Don't you want to get ready too?" she asked icily. "Ah, of course," I got up too, and followed her behind. Just a moment ago I have discovered her truly heart, and now she came back into the monotonousness queen.

I met her in front of the locker room. That time, when she wanted to enter the room to wear the plug suit when I stopped her. "What?" she asked coldly. "Rei…I have finished discover the golden secret of Dead Sea Scrolls and Human Instrumentally Project. You mustn't fight this time, Rei," I murmured at her ear. "I can't do what you wish. I'm sorry," she murmured. "Why do you…with your smile hands…try to carry all these wounds on your back? May be you think you're strong enough to do that, but you are not that strong, Rei. You mustn't sacrifice your self and let your dream buried in order to finish your job," I talked to her seriously.

"You don't know anything about me. And I have no dreams, you know. And I have nothing to be sacrificed," she was still stubborn. "And why I'm feeling surrender when I knew that you have fought enough, and you don't need to harm your self more than this, but you still want to fight?" I whispered. "I wish I could avoid the war. But in the same time, I wish I could work at NERV too. Working here, being with him always makes me feel happy and tranquil," she responded.

Being with Gendou made her happy! "So…you still want to fight the angel now…I have a bad feeling about this war. Can you just care about your self at least once?" I muttered. I swore, I saw a little smile on her lips, but she could pretend well. It wasn't a happy smile, it was a sad smile. She was sad to think about her destiny, her fate. But, her smile vanished as quickly as it appeared. "You don't understand anything," she responded with a calm and icy voice, but in the same time, it sounded cruel too.

"You are still new here. You don't know much about us. That's why you still can talk that way..." she continued her statement. "And if you don't mind, I want to take my plug suit. You're blocking the entrance," she spoke calmly. "I don't understand Rei…you're right…I don't understand why you could betray your destiny…" I mused slowly.

"What do you mean with betray my destiny? I have my own destiny. I make my own destiny," she said monotonously. "Don't you want to know who are your parents, Rei?" I snapped. She stared at me. "I don't have any parents, if you want to know," she responded quickly and firmly, but there's a doubt in her voice. "That's what you know, right?" I had to tell her the truth…

"What do you mean with that?" she still didn't understand. "Why don't you coma back to your father and leave this cruel world?" I asked her again, as coldly as her. "Who is my father?" she muttered with angry but confused eyes. "Adam…" I answered it simply. "Adam!" she whispered, didn't believe what I had said. "You are drunk. Drunk and mad," she whispered again. "I'm not drunk or mad. You need to read more about Dead Sea Scrolls," I mused.

"Dead Sea Scrolls…" she mumbled. And I could saw and feel, a deep sadness painted her expression. "What is it?" I asked her slowly. "I know it, Kaworu…I know it even before you tell me now…I know that I'm gonna die in NERV. I'm gonna sacrifice my self here. That's why I was made. I was made to be sacrificed in the future, to fulfill the words of Dead Sea Scrolls… to lead them… to the Promised Land," she muttered tremblingly and tears fell from the corners of her beautiful eyes.

"Rei…do you really have to sacrifice your self?" I asked again, to reconfirm her decision. She nodded firmly, with a forced smile. "Yes…" then she turned back, and her hands touched the door handle. But suddenly, something made her turned her head back, and looked at me. Looked at my eyes deeply. "I'm not important for Dead Sea Scrolls. There are so many Reis here. They don't need to worry if they loose one. But you…there is only one Kaworu here. And Kaworu has an important role in Dead Sea Scrolls. So Kaworu must be careful. That's what Ayanami wants. She wants him to tell father that she loves him too if Kaworu meets Adam…" after saying that, she came in to the room. And I was standing there, didn't know what to do.

After we got in Eva, I heard Major Katsuragi's voice. "Okay…unit 0 and 2 will be sent out to the battlefield. Unit 0 will be the main fighter, and unit 2 will be the back up. Unit 1 will stay in cage," she said firmly. Shinji protested a little, but it didn't make any change. "Are you ready?" she asked for the last time. "You bet," I snapped and smirked. "Okay, go upside!" she commanded. And the elevator lifted us up to the ground, when we had to meet and greet with the angel.

On the ground, we could see the angel, it looked like a chain. "I warn you, it's not its constant shape. It can turn to any shape any time, so you have to watch carefully," Major Katsuragi's voice again. "No need to do that. Here it comes," Rei mused. She was right, the angel turned its shape into something like snake, and it attacked her. She was trying to shoot that thing, but it didn't work.

"Misato, the rifle is not enough to fight it. Give me the more gigantic weapon!" I yelled at her through the speaker. "I'll give you Dual Shaw! You come to C-883 now!" she ordered. I moved my Eva to the place she told me. I ran as fast as possible. Then, I saw an opened elevator, there is a weapon there. Like a giant hair curler. The angel came over me.

"Like the scenario…I am the one who will survive…and you will die here…" I whispered. Then, I held it between the sides of my weapon. And, that time, I realized a very important thing. This angel was an entering type…it would enter anything stopped it. And it started to enter my weapon. Oh shit! I attacked it once again….and it went away from me…I could feel a little bit relax after that, but not when I knew where was it going to….it was going to…unit 0!

It was like a nightmare. It attacked her, and she tried to shoot it by the rifle. But, like I knew, the rifle wasn't enough. Oh God, it was my fault. I let it attack her. Move, move! I shouted it at my self and my Eva…Move, move! I tried harder, but it didn't want to move. What happened, Eva? You wanted to betray Adam more….!

Then, I recognized that all I could do was just watching. But, I didn't want that. I didn't agree. I couldn't just stand there and watch her death. I saw it…a terrible view…the angel was spreading it disgusting roots to Eva, and to Rei too, I knew that….I knew the way it attacked. It seemed like a thousand years…My Evangelion didn't obey me and I had to let her survive alone.

Until I saw her out from the entry plug, climbed the iron Eva body. What was she doing? And…sarcastically, a memory reminded me about that…The conversation between me and Dr. Akagi Ritsuko.

"_You are Nagisa Kaworu, right?"_

"_Yes, I am,"_

"_Good, now you are the fifth children. I'm gonna explain you about Eva system. First, if there's an emergency situation, you can use a bomb outside to explode something, outside the Eva too. But, it's not recommended by us,"_

"_Why?"_

"_You have to turn the bomb on manually. The bomb is outside and it will explode outside too. So, it's possible you're gonna be hurt or even died because of the explosion,"_

So, that's what she wanted to do? Was she crazy! "Hey Rei! You better stop it. I've learned it from Ritsuko, the woman with blondie hair and lab jacket. It's dangerous to turn it on," I warned her. But no responds. And I realized that she couldn't be that dumb not to know that…she wanted to suicide? She wanted to sacrifice her self, just for them! "No, you Rei, come back now. You cannot do that. You cannot! Oh shit! MISATO, IS THERE ANY STRONGER WEAPON!" I shouted at the speaker. But there's no answer too. Everyone was too shocked.

Move, move, move, you fucking shit Eva! I kept trying to move this shit thing. But it didn't want to… Until at least I had to use that way…"Are you happy seeing her death, Ikari Yui?" I whispered slowly, 'til the speaker couldn't catch my words. "Are you enjoying this?" I still whispered. "It's not what I want…" a soft voice replied.

And suddenly, I could hear everybody was screaming. "Stop it REI! STOP! It's an order! DON'T DO THAT!" or "No, it's too dangerous! YOU CAME BACK NOW!". But it was useless. "Kaworu, can't you do something?" it's Shinji's voice. "Shinji…my eva…it doesn't want to work…it doesn't want to move…Shinji….what can I do!" I was hopeless and desperate to see her, struggled there.

And, suddenly, there's a very bright shine…a too bright shine….I had to close my eyes, and there were some screams. First, I didn't know it, what the hell was that. Until, a sound of big blast heard loudly. It could make you deaf. Everybody was screaming and shrieking. She had turned the bomb on…she had save everyone…she had died…Everybody still tried to call her name, but I knew that it's impossible….

Rei….Rei…!

"_You still can be happy, it seems there's no worried expression on your face. I envy you for that," _

"_Henceforth, there are so many Reis in this world, if you know…so I mustn't be afraid of anything…There are still many successors of me," _

"_You don't know anything about me. And I have no dreams, you know. And I have nothing to be sacrificed"_

"_You are still new here. You don't know much about us. That's why you still can talk that way..."_

"_Who is my father?"_

_. "I know it, Kaworu…I know it even before you tell me now…I know that I'm gonna die in NERV. I'm gonna sacrifice my self here. That's why I was made. I was made to be sacrificed in the future, to fulfill the words of Dead Sea Scrolls… to lead them… to the Promised Land," _

"_I'm not important for Dead Sea Scrolls. There are so many Reis here. They don't need to worry if they loose one. But you…there is only one Kaworu here. And Kaworu has an important role in Dead Sea Scrolls. So Kaworu must be careful. That's what Ayanami wants. She wants him to tell father that she loves him too if Kaworu meets Adam…"_

to be continued

A/N

All the names of weapons, places, books, etc are based on Evangelion comic books. Thank you for reading.


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